Dr. Derek Austin 🥳
2 min readJan 13, 2020

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I loved this quote: “[Phone use is a red flag if] they’re hanging out with you and they’re constantly on their phone […] It’s the fact that I don’t have their undivided attention — ever — that puts my hackles up.” — Megan Boley (”Are You Dating a Bucket of Red Flags?” in P.S. I Love You)

Thanks Megan Boley!!! Your great article inspired me to investigate this particular red flag (mobile phone use) in more detail. Check it out:

I think the solution is better communication.

I am not sure it is clear that the offender (using their phone) realizes that they are making the other person feel uninteresting and put-down.

And, I think this can be solved by asking for what we want — “Hey, can you put your phone away when we hang out?” For example:

Friend: “I see you as not fully engaged and present when I see you looking at your phone.” NOT: “What are you doing there on your phone?”

Derek: “Sorry, my bad. I want a little bit of different stimulation, so can we take a quick walk outside?” NOT: “Why do you want to know?”

Megan Boley’s quote reminds me of the idea that women leave men they love when the men are no longer present, as discussed in The Huffington Post:

Here’s to keeping my phone in my pocket!

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

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Dr. Derek Austin 🥳
Dr. Derek Austin 🥳

Written by Dr. Derek Austin 🥳

Hi, I'm Doctor Derek! I've been a professional web developer since 2005, and I love writing about programming with JavaScript, TypeScript, React, Next.js & Git.

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